Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Do the Right Thing

No, I've never seen that movie. But given the racially charged situation I'm marching into, I probably should.

Oh my goodness, you guys. I'm exhausted. I apologize because I'm incredibly far behind on all y'alls' blogs. But we were running places today. It was so jam-packed.

Food is still not going so well. For breakfast this week, we all got a $25 gift card to Starbucks. Incredibly generous, yes, but I am not going to eat a danish or donut or a bagel. Lunches are crap - I know we shouldn't complain, but I'm talking sandwiches with stale bread, a bag of chips, and a piece of fruit. I usually eat the turkey/lettuce/cheese out of the sandwich and the fruit. Luna Bars and Pure Protein bars are saving my ass. Dinner is actually decent - but we're so hungry after lunch that we just fall upon it like angry wolves. I'm eating and the whole time I'm thinking fatass fatass fatass. Last night was really difficult; thankfully I was able to call Jim and chat about it for a few minutes.

Oh, Jim. I miss him so much. FYI, honey, people love the ring - they think it's so original. You did good, babe.

And thank goodness all the people I'm meeting are wonderful. My roommate and the girls in my hall are fantastic.

And even though there's so much going on in my head, so much that's just fucking with me - the longer I'm here, the longer I realize I'm doing the right thing. This is where I'm supposed to be. Marrying Jim is the right thing to do. Teaching kids is the right thing to do. I know this much.


Cammy said...

Ack, I always hate it at conferences, etc when the only breakfast options are junk foodie stuff. Are you able to steal away to a store some evening so you can buy your own provisions for the mornings/lunch? Just make sure you're taking care of yourself. Don't berate yourself for being hungry! And remember your brain is gobbling up that energy more than anything else, way before it gets near your ass, I promise.

I'm glad you're meeting cool people, can't wait to hear more about how everything is going for you! SO happy that you are confident with your choice for this! They (both Jim and TFA) are very lucky to have you.

Harriet said...

Starbucks has some good food actually. You can get oatmeal, they have a great greek yogurt parfait, a protein plate that has fruit, cheese, a little tiny bagel, peanut butter, etc. Maybe you could stock up for the day at starbucks and skip the yucky box lunches. I hate those things too.

Gaining Back My Life said...

How exciting to feel in your heart and know that you are doing the right thing. You cannot put a value on that.

Kristina said...

I can imagine that the TFA training/conference is SUPER intense and exhausting and has put you (maybe?) out of your comfort zone in many ways. But it's great that you know, that you feel it deep inside, that what you are doing is the right thing for you.
Keep fueling yourself, even if you aren't engaging in physical exercise like you are accustomed to, as Cammy said, you need the energy.
Take care of yourself!

lisalisa said...

eww, lunch sounds dismal! But the starbucks sounds kind of nice; do they have any good smoothies? I'm glad you are feeling confident in the non-food related choices ie TFA and Jim :)