Aaack

In two weeks I am presenting a paper at the Social Science History Association's conference. On the plus side, I get to go to Miami. On the minus side, holy shit there is so much that could go wrong with this. I don't know how I'm going to get from the airport to the hotel. The hotel is two blocks away from where the conference is, so I should be okay there. My panel session is over at noon, but my flight back to Cincinnati doesn't leave until 8 PM. And then it makes a layover somewhere in the Carolinas, meaning I will be back in Ohio on Monday. At which point I need to drive back to OU for a class at 1 PM.

The very next day, I take the GRE. I signed up for the goddamn thing back when I thought I might apply to a couple of programs, just to see if I could get funding. That's not happening.

Okay. Realistically, I know my presentation isn't a big deal. I'll go, I'll stand up there and talk for fifteen minutes, click through some slides, and garble some answers to whatever questions the other discussants have. If I can avoid fainting or peeing myself, I suppose that's good enough. Even if I blow it big time, the chances of it affecting my future are slim. I have nothing to be afraid of. And yet I'm scared pantsless.