Friday

It's going to get worse, but there isn't going to be a depression. I'll never be able to get a house, but at least I won't have to drive to California in a beat-up jalopy and wind up breastfeeding a dying man in a barn.

This has been a long time coming.

Pakistani military analysts say the ongoing US-Pakistan border skirmishes won't escalate. Sure.

Bill Gates' market-based plan for increasing African crop yields. I have the audacity to hope.

Please please please let this turn into more than rumors. Ricky Gervais is hilarious.

Wow. I'm glad I share a state with a giant corn maze likeness of Sarah Palin.

PETA: please, shut the fuck up. Really.