MAN today was crummy. Here's why:
1. Yesterday I fell off my bike, which added pain and discomfort to today.
See, Jim has an official mountain-bike bike, and he's really enjoying terrifying-sounding things like "singletracks" and "switchbacks." I have yet to attempt these things. The other day, though, Jim said hey! we should mountain bike together! you can learn how and then we can ride along steep dirt trails, a couple so blazingly athletic that we risk blinding bystanders! And I think well, I'm a little scared because I had a bad fall the last time I went out and we were just on a regular trail (with a convenient patch of gravel for me to fall into), but I want to spend time with Jim and hey, maybe I can be a sleek, blazingly athletic woman on a bike.
So we start off on the trail and I'm terrified. I'm moving at about 5 mph along this trail that is 80% rock, 10% tree roots and 10% certain death, but with the amount of adrenaline I'm pumping I feel like I'm flying. But after I manage to stay upright for a while and we get out of the woods, I start to get some confidence. I come up on a series of small hills and think hey, I can do thi- GAAHRGRRAAAGGGHHHHHAAAHHHHHH
Given the force and volume of my scream Jim thought I had died, but I just banged up my legs and arm. I was bad ass and used my water bottle to wash off my wounds and kept going. Then later on this ride I fell into a marsh, but that's not funny so much as it is just sad. And I was hurty all day.
2. Today I got a call from my summer-work boss (I'm working for the Teach for America office) asking about the breakfast that was supposed to be delivered to a training and then I realize I FORGOT TO ORDER BREAKFAST. I was eating my own breakfast at the time and almost threw up. I really haven't felt that particular kind of oh fuck since the last time I realized a homework assignment was missing just as I walked into class. I spent the morning frantically calling Einstein's and finally got the bagels to the training about an hour after they were supposed to get there. FAIL. Of course my boss was super understanding about it and in the grand scheme, it wasn't that big a deal. But I still felt like I was going to go to detention.
3. I've been working on another project for my summer job and it has been the most tedious, frustrating thing I've dealt with in a while. There are files I can't find, instructions that aren't clear, docs that won't open. It's just my luck that the same woman who's directing this project is the one who was leading the training for which the bagels were late. That may be the worst sentence I've ever written. I'm letting it stand.
4. Of course, when I start to feel incompetent, my brain turns on my poor, battered body. You are so fat, it whispered as I struggled to color-code the tables of contents (like culs de sac?). Your stomach is really, really gross. Like a flesh marshmallow. Of course my rather less-nourishing food choices today haven't been helpful.
5. Now that I've bitched through this post, I am starting to feel guilty for bitching. Lisa, I say to myself, you know there are at least 5 billion people whose days probably were a lot worse than yours. Like they had car accidents or lost their jobs or had malaria. So you have no right to feel bad.
And there you have it, folks.