Monday, August 9, 2010

A day so crappy I had to write about it

MAN today was crummy. Here's why:

1. Yesterday I fell off my bike, which added pain and discomfort to today.

See, Jim has an official mountain-bike bike, and he's really enjoying terrifying-sounding things like "singletracks" and "switchbacks." I have yet to attempt these things. The other day, though, Jim said hey! we should mountain bike together! you can learn how and then we can ride along steep dirt trails, a couple so blazingly athletic that we risk blinding bystanders! And I think well, I'm a little scared because I had a bad fall the last time I went out and we were just on a regular trail (with a convenient patch of gravel for me to fall into), but I want to spend time with Jim and hey, maybe I can be a sleek, blazingly athletic woman on a bike.

So we start off on the trail and I'm terrified. I'm moving at about 5 mph along this trail that is 80% rock, 10% tree roots and 10% certain death, but with the amount of adrenaline I'm pumping I feel like I'm flying. But after I manage to stay upright for a while and we get out of the woods, I start to get some confidence. I come up on a series of small hills and think hey, I can do thi- GAAHRGRRAAAGGGHHHHHAAAHHHHHH

Given the force and volume of my scream Jim thought I had died, but I just banged up my legs and arm. I was bad ass and used my water bottle to wash off my wounds and kept going. Then later on this ride I fell into a marsh, but that's not funny so much as it is just sad. And I was hurty all day.

2. Today I got a call from my summer-work boss (I'm working for the Teach for America office) asking about the breakfast that was supposed to be delivered to a training and then I realize I FORGOT TO ORDER BREAKFAST. I was eating my own breakfast at the time and almost threw up. I really haven't felt that particular kind of oh fuck since the last time I realized a homework assignment was missing just as I walked into class. I spent the morning frantically calling Einstein's and finally got the bagels to the training about an hour after they were supposed to get there. FAIL. Of course my boss was super understanding about it and in the grand scheme, it wasn't that big a deal. But I still felt like I was going to go to detention.

3. I've been working on another project for my summer job and it has been the most tedious, frustrating thing I've dealt with in a while. There are files I can't find, instructions that aren't clear, docs that won't open. It's just my luck that the same woman who's directing this project is the one who was leading the training for which the bagels were late. That may be the worst sentence I've ever written. I'm letting it stand.

4. Of course, when I start to feel incompetent, my brain turns on my poor, battered body. You are so fat, it whispered as I struggled to color-code the tables of contents (like culs de sac?). Your stomach is really, really gross. Like a flesh marshmallow. Of course my rather less-nourishing food choices today haven't been helpful.

5. Now that I've bitched through this post, I am starting to feel guilty for bitching. Lisa, I say to myself, you know there are at least 5 billion people whose days probably were a lot worse than yours. Like they had car accidents or lost their jobs or had malaria. So you have no right to feel bad.

And there you have it, folks.


lisalisa said...

Awww, it really does sound like a crappy day. The way you wrote about it, though, made me smile (internally). And I doubt anyone will remember their bagels being an hour late, in the long run.

You still kick ass.

Claire said...

It doesn't matter if other people have had bad days. It sounds like your day has been pretty bad, and you are definitely entitled to rant about it without feeling guilty!

But at least today is over now and you can have a fresh start tomorrow :)

Harriet said...

Hey, I had a really crappy day yesterday. Today wasn't as bad. Venting about bad days is a good reason to have a blog. I'm sorry your day sucked.

I Hate to Weight said...

we all have crappy days. pain AND other crappiness = major suckiness.

i hate and despise tedious projects. detail IS the devil. my brain clicks out, i can't focus and my mind wanders off. hours later -- the tasks are still not accomplished.

hope all days to come are much better!!!!! but if they're not, vent away

Cammy said...

Did you ever read the book 'Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good Very Bad Day'? Well if not, I hope you do because it's a classic, and if so, you'll know what I mean when I say "even in Australia..."

But seriously babe hate that it was a rough day for you. Sometimes when it rains it pours...and I bet those people appreciated their breakfasts much more after having to wait, it can be seen as an exercins in keeping people from taking things for granted? Keep your chin up and watch out for marshes... ;) <3

Sarah said...

Hahahahaha, that bike recap is pretty much the best thing I have ever read. I'm so sorry it hurt though! Today we went mountain biking down BOTH of those terrifying things (singletracks and switchbacks.) I did fine until we hit a gravel and sand road that was ferociously downhill. I rode my brakes hard and kept nearly wiping out. My dad yelled, "you're making it harder on yourself. Just let yourself go fast!" I screamed back, "I don't like being out of control!"

I think this is a metaphor for my life...

Anyway, I'm glad your boss wasn't upset and hey, people might not even have noticed the late breakfast, and if they did they probably didn't know it was your fault :)