I'm starting to get a panicky, hummingbird-on-cocaine feeling whenever I think about the school year starting - so I'm spending most of the day feeling like a coked-out bird.
There's just so much going on, from all over the place. This is kind of petty, but why was I the only instructor on the entire first floor who didn't receive a pad of chart paper? I wouldn't care, but a) that shit is expensive and b) this is not the first time I've been shorted on supplies. I don't know who I pissed off, but I will do anything to apologize. And some recent legislation sent stock from Jim's company down the tubes and added a bajillion more hoops for them to jump through. I have a new paraprofessional and I'm nervous about working with her. My school didn't make AYP for the third year in a row - if we don't make it this year, the school closes. Period. It's not a tragedy for me, because we'll be moving anyway after our two-year commitments are up, but a couple of the teachers have worked at the school since it opened 30 years ago. And my principal created an elaborate schedule for the preschool/pre-k classes that, while certainly rigorous, seems to have no basis in reality. It takes two grown women longer than 5 minutes to use the bathroom - how does it make sense to allot that same amount of time to 16 three-year-olds?
And deep down I'm absolutely terrified that once the kids are back in my classroom, it'll be just as awful and miserable as it was last year.
I need more primates.
Orangutan says chill the fuck out, Lisa.
3 comments:
i can not tell you how much i hope it is a zillion times better than last year.
i CAN understand your anxiety.
and yes, WHERE DID THE SUMMER GO.
http://www.zoopraha.cz/upload/fck/mlade%20kijivu.JPG
your three years old are 98% compatible with primates;)
And they were very creative with using classroom/another students/your clothes as bathroom, weren´t they?
Every day you are more experienced and greater teacher Lisa!
Like you, I'm contracted through a third party to teach (I think that's how TFA works, right?) I am also nervous about my students being the same and/or worse as my students last year, and my room doesn't have a working tv, a DVD player, a projector, a computer, or any of the things the other teachers have, PLUS it wasn't cleaned all summer (I had to clean it myself, which meant removing DEAD SPIDER EXOSKELETONS,) and I was also stressed about readying the room for students while I sat through training sessions on material I've already taught.
I hope you can take some time to create a calm before the storm. Go read some magazines at Barnes and Noble or take a walk by some water or something. I know that has helped me! I know everything will be ready in time, and I have decided that I am not going to stress about the students until Tuesday (our first day of school) when I have some sort of basis for my stress level.
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